2020 is truly turning out to be the Gwyneth Paltrow of years; being overly dramatic and rife with misguided opinions concerning health. I mean we’ve gone from Australia burning, to Brexit, to Kobe, to a worldwide pandemic! And we’re not even halfway through the year.
When we look back on this time – providing a nuclear holocaust isn’t the cherry on top to round up 2020 – we will no doubt question if it really happened or it was just some terrible nightmare we just can’t forget.
Now while the lockdown is undoubtedly taxing your mental will to live, it is never the less necessary so we can make it through this thing as best we can. So with that in mind, I thought I would give five helpful tips to make it through lockdown.
1. To grow or not to grow?
Have you ever wanted to shave your head without the fear of being labelled a white supremacist? Or grow out your hair so long without people throwing money at you on the street? then this years for you.
Go ahead and try out that hairstyle you’ve always wanted, theirs no social judgement to fear when you don’t have a social life. If there was ever a better time to try something new, it’s now.
Why not see what the shape of your head actually looks like, or if dreadlocks are what you’ve been missing in life. Enjoy it while it lasts before you emerge from your enforced hibernation to find a country that looks like a cross between Woodstock and a Neo-Nazi convention – but it’s the year of Brexit so no harm no foul.
2. Learn whether you love or hate your family
Now while its easy to love your family and partners when you get to breeze in and out of there lives. Now, thanks to enforced lockdown means you can really find out if you think they’re unmatched good company, or the most irritating bunch of twats you’ve ever met.
Embrace this opportunity to find the things that make you really care about these people and the things that make you want to repeatedly punch them in the face. It could be anything from telling good jokes to tunelessly whistling for hours on end. Jump right in and find out what makes them tick.
3. Go out and get that exercise
You’ll find that when you’re only allowed out for one walk a day, you really start to appreciate the little things in life, like hearing birds sing while they jump from branch to branch, or simply breathing air that doesn’t smell like farts and sweat.
Get out and stretch those legs, explore new areas, like a picturesque walk in the isolated countryside, or an urban wander to see people drinking in the park. Keep your mind and body fit with some casual exercise, and remember that when you see someone walking towards you, calmly cover your mouth, and run away from them at full speed.
4. Become a master cook
Rationing is the perfect challenge to make you a Michelin star chef. Gordon Ramsey, Jamie Oliver, they might be able to make culinary masterpieces with a wide array of ingredients and spices, but let’s see how they fair with two turnips and a tin of spam.
Push yourself to the limits, be creative, and make the best meals you can with the limited options you’ve got, you’ll be world-famous in no time. Or just have a Pot Noodle with cut up bits of ham in it, the choice is yours.
5. Be smart
Ultimately, the most important tip to make it through this horrible pandemic is not being an eejit. Listen to the guidance of the government, make sure to keep washing your hands, to keep up social distancing, to not endanger at-risk groups. While this virus isn’t so serious for some it can be deadly to others, so try and be considerate for those who are scared beyond there wits about this virus. Sacrifice your social life so that others won’t have to put loved ones in the ground.
If we pull together I am sure we can make it through this pandemic, and while 2020 has been a rollercoaster of a year, here’s hoping it can define us as a generation, making us stronger and more considerate for the years to come.